taylweaver (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
taylweaver) wrote2007-05-30 11:06 pm
taylweaver) wrote2007-05-30 11:06 pm
Entry tags:
The impact of perspective
So the saga of the knees continues.
Many of you, good readers, are sick and tired of hearing about it - though most of you have not heard the latest. After seeing a doctor for my knee pain in March and April, and after trying some stuff that didn't work, I got sent to another doctor for a second opinion. I saw Doctor #2 yesterday evening.
Doctor #1 told me that I should avoid stairs and any other knee-bending activities. He also thought that I might need surgery.
Doctor #2 said physical therapy is the way to go, and that the stairs, while painful, are doing no actual harm.
What is interesting is that, since the appointment, I actually feel like my knees are hurting less.
I am marveling at how much difference perception makes. There was so much stuff I felt like I couldn't do after I saw the first doctor. I was trying so hard to be good to my knees, and trying not to cause damage. In the process, I was making myself feel limited, and also disabled, in some small way. This experience did give me a small window into what it is like to have a physical disability (though only a very small one, since I could always get away with being "normal" by choosing to climb the stairs or whatever and just deal with the pain and try not to think about the harm - a choice that many people with physical disabilities are not free to make.) It was, however, not fun. For me or for my friends. (sorry about that, guys...)
I do still think of my knee problems as a minor disability. I still cannot go running or climbing too many stairs. But it really does make a difference to know that I am only causing myself short-term pain with these activities, not long-term damage. It makes me feel suddenly free - like I can do so many more things. And when my knees hurt, oh well. It's annoying and I may whine and stuff - but I feel like, if I wanted to, I could get up and dance at a simcha. I could climb up to a fourth floor walk-up apartment without worrying about hurting myself. And all of that makes the pain feel less. Because it is less of a big deal.
Perception really is a powerful thing.
And no, I am not obsessing about my knees. Look I am being positive. Really, not obsessing. Really.
Now, if only I could find a good physical therapist who takes my insurance...
Many of you, good readers, are sick and tired of hearing about it - though most of you have not heard the latest. After seeing a doctor for my knee pain in March and April, and after trying some stuff that didn't work, I got sent to another doctor for a second opinion. I saw Doctor #2 yesterday evening.
Doctor #1 told me that I should avoid stairs and any other knee-bending activities. He also thought that I might need surgery.
Doctor #2 said physical therapy is the way to go, and that the stairs, while painful, are doing no actual harm.
What is interesting is that, since the appointment, I actually feel like my knees are hurting less.
I am marveling at how much difference perception makes. There was so much stuff I felt like I couldn't do after I saw the first doctor. I was trying so hard to be good to my knees, and trying not to cause damage. In the process, I was making myself feel limited, and also disabled, in some small way. This experience did give me a small window into what it is like to have a physical disability (though only a very small one, since I could always get away with being "normal" by choosing to climb the stairs or whatever and just deal with the pain and try not to think about the harm - a choice that many people with physical disabilities are not free to make.) It was, however, not fun. For me or for my friends. (sorry about that, guys...)
I do still think of my knee problems as a minor disability. I still cannot go running or climbing too many stairs. But it really does make a difference to know that I am only causing myself short-term pain with these activities, not long-term damage. It makes me feel suddenly free - like I can do so many more things. And when my knees hurt, oh well. It's annoying and I may whine and stuff - but I feel like, if I wanted to, I could get up and dance at a simcha. I could climb up to a fourth floor walk-up apartment without worrying about hurting myself. And all of that makes the pain feel less. Because it is less of a big deal.
Perception really is a powerful thing.
And no, I am not obsessing about my knees. Look I am being positive. Really, not obsessing. Really.
Now, if only I could find a good physical therapist who takes my insurance...